It’s not very easy to be a woman in today’s society. I don’t mean from a political sense or even from what you see on tv and movies (that’s a whole different soapbox). I am talking about the physical and mental burdens we women willingly (and I use that word loosely) take on in our daily lives.  We are “Wonder Woman” or at least we try to convince ourselves we are. I  like to pretend I can do it all at 100% but thanks to my anxiety I’ve learned I most certainly can’t and stay sane at the same time. Oh the battles we ensue within ourselves and our lives because we feel we must do it all and do it perfectly.  The big word here is “perfect.”  If we aren’t doing it “perfect,” does that mean we aren’t enough?  Enough for what? Enough for who? And what standards qualify Enough? Why does it have to be that way? Thanks to the beauty of social media and the picture perfect posts out there, we “normal people” doubt ourselves. I am so glad Facebook and social media didn’t exist when I was a younger. I thought it was hard enough to grow up with the Sports Illustrated swim suit models of the 80’s and 90’s…. but now we have posts of perfection all over the internet and social media. Perfect hair, perfect skin, perfectly perky boobs (as if you didn’t have kids), perfect family, perfect perfect perfect perfect. Guess what?? Nothing is perfect and no one is perfect. And most importantly – you are Enough just the way you are. Even through those perfect posts – they are not perfect.

I want to tell all of those tired moms out there – You are Enough and you aren’t alone! You are there for your kids, your family, your job, your house, etc…  We try to keep everything in order from the moment we wake up until the moment our eyes can’t stay open a second longer at night. I am very thankful for my own tribe and village of fellow moms as my supporters. We cheer on the successes and listen to each when the kids are being little shits. It’s not easy being a mom and certainly not for the faint of heart. I always tell people I have three kids (now four) my two boys, my husband and now my dog. Did you notice I used the word “my”? That’s because it all ends up being my responsibility to take care. I took on that role quite earnestly – I am helper, a fixer, a caregiver, and need to be needed. The Wonder Woman syndrome has definitely wreaked havoc on my life, my family, and my anxiety over the years. If you aren’t perfect, if things aren’t done perfectly, and if everything doesn’t fit into their perfect little boxes, there is something wrong. I am learning very very very slowly throughout my messy journey to accept that not being perfect all of the time or even some of the time – is Enough.

My own mother told me recently that she was talking to her tribe/her village about me and my anxiety. Apparently they were shocked to hear I had anxious feelings – because to them I seemed perfectly put together and calm. I laughed at their supposed usage of the word calm or anything perfectly to describe me.  I used to think it was obvious to everyone how I was feeling on the inside and definitely fell victim to my share of “mean girls.”  As I’ve grown older, the ability to mask my anxious feelings has become much easier (at least from the outside).  I still get the stomach aches and headaches and nervousness.  Being an extrovert definitely helps. I feel better around people with my pearl earrings, my Lilly Pulitzer, and my hair as close to in its place as possible. What I have also learned in this messy journey of mine – that I’d like to share – none of the superficial BS really matters.

What you have or don’t have… Where you live or don’t live… What you wear or don’t wear (but you have to wear something)… What you post…. 100% DOES NOT define you or make you Enough. Do you know what makes you enough?  YOU! Accepting and loving yourself for who you are – all imperfectly perfect throughout your own personal messy journey. Who cares what the internet and social media or anyone else for that matter says or does.  Who cares if you drop your kids off to school without a bra on and your breast-fed boobs hanging to your knees. Who cares if you have dark circles and smeared mascara under your eyes that you didn’t realize. Who cares if you butt jiggles a little (or a lot) more than it did in your 20’s? Who cares if you let your kids eat cereal for dinner regularly? Who cares if you don’t vacuum every day or if the dishes are piled up in the sink? Who cares if you didn’t have time to take a shower and fall asleep on the sofa.

Your kids (those little adorable beasts) love you no matter what you wear, what you do for a living, or what the dishes look like in the sink (as long as they don’t have to do them). At the end of the day, when they snuggle with you and tell you they love you right before they drift off to sleep (even when you still smell from the gym earlier that day) that’s what matters.

Moms – You are enough just as imperfect as you are!